I NEED HELP

It has been a while since I have blogged. I can't believe I have let so much time past. It certainly wasn't that I had nothing to say! Trust me on that. So many things were going on, I just didn't know where to begin.

But here I am on this day, October 19th. I had a birthday on the 4th making me a year older, and hopefully wiser. I don't know about that last part, but for sure I am a year older.

I wanted to share this with you all who read my blog. I am a professional storyteller and have joined two storytelling groups that have stayed the test of time. I used to be a member of two others, but they didn't last long. The National Association of Black Storytellers, Inc. has a festival and conference in various different cities in this country and have been for 32 years. This year's festival will be held in Arlington, VA on November 12-15.

I am anticipating receiving disability for a chronic illness I suffer with, but I haven't gotten the money yet and the festival is right around the corner. I have a roommate, but don't want to leave her hanging at the last minute. So, I decided to set up a gofundme account and hope and pray that I get the money to attend my festival with donations.  I have been going to the NABS festivals since 1995. I missed two festivals since then, both because I couldn't get off work. I don't want to miss this festival in Arlington. So, if you can find it in your heart to help me, I hope that you do. Here is the link to my gofundme account.

https://funds.gofundme.com/dashboard/darbywest

IT IS NOT JUST ABOUT PAIN

Most people don’t know much about fibromyalgia. They think that it is just about pain, but there are so many different symptoms of this illness. When I tell someone that I have fibro, the reactions are different. These are some of the many comments that I have gotten: “You don’t look sick!” “You just need to up your vitamin intake.” “Stop eating meat!” “You need to get moving, and you’ll feel better!” “This woman I know used to have fibromyalgia, but her doctor cured her.” “Have you thought about acupuncture or meditation?” It can be very frustrating to say the least.

I just want to be able to go to bed one night and sleep for five hours straight. I want to be able to wake up and not have to drag myself out of the bed, tired, aching and stiff. I want to be able to walk into any room and not forget what I was going to get. I would like to be able to rest, uninterrupted by unwanted visitors who don’t take into consideration my illness, or who make light of it.

It is tough dealing with the issues I face each day. I am trying to live without an income while my disability is determined by a group of folks that have never met me, who don’t know my plight, or what I go through daily. So, when I get a call from someone complaining about having missed a sale, or some other nonsense I get so disgusted I want to scream. I don’t want to hear anyone’s problems. I am not trying to be inconsiderate, I just simply don’t want to hear about your issues. There is nothing I can do to make them better, so please just spare me.

I have never liked people just to drop by my house without calling. I have always thought that was rude and inconsiderate. It is especially rude and inconsiderate for someone that is sick. There are many nights I go to bed and don’t wash my dishes. There are days where I don’t feel like putting on clothes, or straightening up the house. There are days where I just don’t want to be bothered with anyone. So, don’t come to my house and expect me to answer the door if you didn’t call me first. I have enough on my plate handling me…I can’t handle me and you both. Sometimes I am just depressed, and I don’t have to give an explanation about why.

So, fibromyalgia is more than just pain. It’s sleepless nights. It’s restless mornings. It’s fibro fog or forgetfulness. It’s depression. It’s stressful. All I ask is for some  kindness, consideration, and understanding.